Motivations

 

When we are stressed out, getting some motivations is a good way of gaining some relief and self control.

“A man, as a general rule, owes very little to what he is born with a man is what he makes himself." 
Alexander Graham Bell 

"Double  no, triple  our troubles and we�d still be better off than any other people on earth."
Ronald Reagan

"Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can�t build on it; it’s only for wallowing in."
-Katherine Mansfield

"Survival, with honor, that outmoded and all-important word, is as difficult as ever and as all-important to a writer. Those who do not last are always more beloved since no one has to see them in their long, dull, unrelenting, no-quarter-given-and-no-quarter-received, fights that they make to do something as they believe it should be done before they die. Those who die or quit early and easy and with every good reason are preferred because they are understandable and human. Failure and well-disguised cowardice are more human and more beloved." Ernest Hemingway

Stress?

We are actually stressed without even knowing it.

When asked "Where does stress actually come from?" Most people will probably go and make a list of several factors that cause stress: a work load from school, parents nagging, friends being selfish, "unfair" teachers, bad hair/skin, your brother/sister, etc. These things and many more are actually called stressors. Actually what our reaction is to these stressors. -(and they can come from positive events as well as negative ones.) is what causes stress

Our reaction to stressors causes a change in our energy level-that can be felt inside by you and your body and can also be felt on the outside by others-did you ever come into school in a great mood and your friend is in a bad mood and all of a sudden you are in a bad mood too?? That is because the energy you give off is contagious just like the flu virus! While we cannot possibly eliminate all of these stressors from our lives completely, we can eliminate some of them and learn how to respond to the other ones. This is what is known as Stress Management. It is not hard, does not cost anything or take any time & does not have to be boring! It can be fun and very empowering! I will show you a few things in a minute or two.

Lets talk about reactions for a minute. Reaction is defined as: "1. A response to a stimulus. 2. The state resulting from such a response.3.A reverse or opposing action." Reactions can be quick and instant or a little more controlled- Your reactions to a person, situation or event are based on your knowledge, your emotional state & your beliefs. If you want to change the way you react in certain situations or to a certain person or to certain groups of people, you must first change one of those things.

There is a surprising fact that many of you are not aware of: Stress does NOT come from these things we just listed!

A simple definition of stress is this: the uncomfortable gap between how we would like our life to be & how it actually is. Sowhen trying to rectifythe difference, stress comes from....inside your mind!! If you remember that fact, you will always be one step ahead in managing stress.

Stress left unmanaged can cause more physical. Mental and emotional conditions than I can list here. Some of the effects are not reversible. It is highly important to recognize it & do something now to get it under control before it does permanent damage to you, to others and to your Life..

There are simple changes you can make to train your mind not to react or to react more positively to stressors-here are some of those ways:

CARE OF THE BODY- Proper Nutrition

CARE OF THE MIND- Lifestyle

CARE OF THE EMOTIONS-Tools

-Other ways to manage stress include: Poper (positive) Attitude, Sense of Purpose, Healthy Relationships, Self Control, Acid/Alkaline Environments-(see other article) Proper amount of Sleep, Good Time Management, Commitment to Learning, Balance of work/Leisure Activities, correct amount & quality of food and water, positive Lifestyle Habits, Breath Techniques, daily Movement/Exercise, Leisure Activities.

In reality, we know what to do to manage our stress,its just a matter of remembering to do it. Its a matter of re-wiring the Stress Response into a more positive, empowering action. Once you begin to take back your sense of self-control by doing just one ofthe above strategies, you will begin to make the other changes necessary to manage every aspect of your Life better. Start with one thing, and then go from there. In most cases, it takes a long time for your Life to become stressful, and it will take sometime to get it back to the way you desire!

Stress and Pressure

 

Its time to change our lives in a more positive approach

Managing pressure effectively

What happens to us?

These days a lot of people feel as though they're being asked to do the impossible. Because they're good at what they do, employees are expected to do more, fix problems, handle crises, and in general, cope with all variety of situations with a level head.

Managers are expected to deal not only with their own pressure, but also with the pressure of the people they manage. There are some people who literally feel like the meat in a sandwich because they are being squeezed from above and below. And when people themselves feel pressurised, they often put additional pressure on their colleagues: a kind of domino theory of coping with stress.

Now, the one and only truism about stress, is that it's different for everyone: what causes one person to feel pressured won't be true for someone else. In other words, one person's stress is another's excitement.

Equally, it is not stress itself that is the problem, but the way in which people react to the causes of stress. Unexpected things happen to us, extra demands are made, time runs out, deadlines get passed - this is the stuff of our workaday and personal lives over which we may appear to have little control. How we deal with the seemingly 'uncontrollable' is the key to good stress management.

Most people need a certain amount of pressure to motivate and challenge them, particularly in the workplace. The reasons many of us enjoy working isn't simply to bring home a pay cheque; we want job satisfaction, opportunities to stretch ourselves, learn new skills and develop working relationships with colleagues.

The kind of pressure that keeps us on our toes and gets us to use our capabilities more fully is healthy and desirable. Without it, life would be incredibly routine and dull. But when the pressure becomes unmanageable, routine and dull begins to look very attractive. We need pressure, but too much will make us unproductive and inefficient.
So, it's important to know just what gets to us: any effective work on pressure will include what's known as a 'stress audit'. Here people define for themselves the difference between challenging stress and harmful stress and what happens to them under both kinds of pressure.

Here's an exercise to try out:

Imagine your life is a big pot sitting on a stove over a medium flame: all the contents are bubbling and simmering along nicely. What's in your pot? What can you define that gives you satisfaction; what enhances and supports your work and personal life? What do you know you cope with well: what's a comfortable amount of stress for you?

Also imagine that the flame under the pot is the energy you need to exert to keep everything moving along smoothly.

It's important to know the kinds of pressure that you can cope with, because, surprisingly, most of us cope - and cope well -with a lot more stress than we imagine.

Now, what about the pressure you don't cope with so well? This time imagine your pot beginning to boil over. It can boil over for two reasons: one is that too much gets put in the pot and there's no more room; and, two, the flame suddenly gets higher and everything heats up faster than the pot can handle.

What happens in your life that over-fills your pot? What extra things get added to your everyday life that you find you can't cope with quite as well? Alternatively, what things in your life are apt to 'heat up' on occasion and cause an over-spill? And how does this stress manifest itself? Do you get depressed, fall ill, get short tempered, feel you’re stretched to breaking point? What exactly happens to you?

Here's an example to demonstrate what we mean

The day starts off well - you've got your time organised and you know what you have to accomplish by the end of it. You have a lot to do, but it's the kind of pressure you enjoy so you feel in control of your time. By 10am, however, three people have descended upon you insisting that each of their projects has priority and you've got to drop everything and give your time to them.

Suddenly your pot is too full. Your day now looks a mess, your time has been hijacked and you may start to feel overwhelmed by additional pressure.

Let's use the same scenario, except this time, instead of people descending upon you, your boss comes along and criticises your output for the past week and tells you he expects more from you.

Suddenly the heat just went up. Now you may feel deflated by the high expectations pressing in on you.

If we stick with the simmering pan analogy for a moment, when a pot boils over, first it makes a mess and then it puts out the flame. The energy you were using to keep everything on an even keel is now used up - there's nothing left. The pot may have stopped boiling over, but now nothing is cooking.

Pressure can sometimes get so on top of you that you grind to a dead halt and function at a low level of effectiveness, if at all.

This is the point where very little, or nothing, seems to go right. Disasters pile up, personality difficulties seem to magnify, communication with those around you disintegrates. The end results can vary from irritability, insomnia, substance abuse, nervous breakdowns; and any number of other physical, emotional and mental difficulties in between.

Too much pressure can also feel 'normal'. People get so used to working under enormous pressure that they manage to ignore the many symptoms that manifest themselves. They often don't do anything about it until they fall over and are forced to look at the situation.

People often confuse lack of ability with being under too much stress. By this we mean that if someone is simply not up to the job, or requires additional skills and support to do a good job, they may feel pressurised and blame it on too much stress. Of course, life can feel very stressful under these circumstances, but the reality is that it is the lack of ability that's at the root of the problem. Anyone who has acquired a new, relatively difficult skill will know what we are talking about: 'before', the work that required the skill was overwhelming and incomprehensible; 'after', it all seems like a piece of cake.

As we said at the beginning, one person's stress could be another's excitement. Let's go back to our scenario: you could be someone who thrives on people rushing up to your desk and demanding things of you - you love juggling lots of projects, people and deadlines.

You might be someone to whom criticism from the boss is water off a duck's back: you take it as helpful feedback and are happy to work out a strategy for improving things.

On the other hand, you, who cope so well with people, might be someone who goes into a complete panic when the printer conks out. That might be when you feel completely out of control, and that's what will tip you over the edge.

Which means that there can never be one way of effectively dealing with pressure, since no two people are affected by stresses in the same way. And, of course, depending upon what else is going on in your life, what feels manageable one day, may feel overwhelming the next.

Managing Pressure

Fortunately, there are things you can do that help you manage the pressure without getting the sack or alienating your colleagues, family and friends. They also don’t require you to quit your job and live in silent retreat on a remote island (a recurrent fantasy of those who feel under the cosh most of the time!).

Now, let's say you know the causes of unmanageable stress and can see them coming at you from afar, but it actually feels as though there's nothing you can do about it. You may even cry in despair, "But I'm already doing everything I can! What more can I do?"

What do you do when you think you are doing all that you can? Doing more won't work: that just creates more pressure and stress and accelerates the point of total burn out. Doing less won't work either: the time created by doing less simply gives you more time to worry about the things you aren’t doing! There's only one option left, and that's to do things differently.

"What do you mean, do things differently? I've tried everything I can think of and nothing works!"

Well, we look at the things you haven't thought of, because when people are in the middle of overwhelm they are usually unable to see what else they could do.

Do a 'Stress Audit'

By identifying what stresses overwhelm you, what happens to you and where break point (or points) is, you look at prevention as well as cure.

Choose a different way to behave

When you're watching your pot spew boiling liquid all over everything (including yourself), it's really hard to see just what you could do differently. The situation may feel so fraught that it's impossible to see much of anything clearly and you'll do what you've always done in a crisis. That's because, when under pressure, the human mind and body is programmed to revert to type.

Now, many people assume that if they change their behaviour, they'll create more stress than they have already. Not so. Yes, if you try to change everything and become a different person, you'll feel more stressed. Trying to make big changes usually results in failure and disappointment. Small, easy-to-do changes, and creating lots of small ‘wins’ are what's wanted: they'll bolster your confidence so you'll want to practise even more.

Understand the link between Communication and Stress

Communication log-jams, unresolved conflict, avoidance of uncomfortable situations and pretending things are all right when they aren't, will cause stress. Therefore, anything that improves communication or clears the air will reduce pressure. Given that we have to communicate at work all the time, there are always opportunities to improve our interpersonal skills.

Set Appropriate Boundaries

When people do descend on your desk, it's perfectly acceptable to tell each person how willing you are to help, but that you can't get to their work till tomorrow (or three o'clock or next week, etc.). Every time they insist it has to be done today, you show lots of empathy and understanding and willingness, but you still won't be able to get to their work till tomorrow.

Boundaries are one of the key ways to make clear to others just how far you're willing to go and what your limits are.

Practise the Art of Saying "No"

Along with boundaries, it's important to look at whether you are an easy 'mark', where people will come to you for that little extra because you won't refuse. There are an infinite number of ways to say 'No' without ever having to use the word. For instance, pre-empting a raid on your time is a great ploy: "I know what you're going to ask me and you've caught me at the worst time to be of help to anyone."

Lower your Standards

What? Lower my standards? That doesn't feel like good advice. However, by setting 'perfectionistic' standards that are so high they are impossible to reach, many people create unnecessary pressure for themselves. By lowering your standards, you can create far more 'wins' for yourself, and 'wins' make us all feel great.

Ask for Support

Along with too high standards, many people are also reluctant to ask for support: they don't want to appear weak and vulnerable. Keeping problems and difficulties to yourself and trying to cope on your own is foolish. Asking for support is not a sign of weakness - it is actually a sign of intelligence. It gets you out of a hole and it gives other people an opportunity to help out.

Stop

Not stop in terms of collapse; but stop for a few minutes and get yourself out of the situation: take a loo break, make a cup of tea, walk around the block, phone a friend. When we can't see the woods for the trees, it's time to step out and take a break. It won't solve the whole problem, but it will give you some much-needed breathing space.

Find the Humour

Believe it or not, most situations do have their humorous side. Being able to see it may be difficult, but taking things too seriously is guaranteed to compound already existing stress.

Give yourself a Treat

Look for opportunities to reward yourself for such milestones as: it's Wednesday, the Tube was on time, the Tube was late, it's raining for the sixth day in a row, the sun just came out, you found a parking space and so on. Too often we feel as though we only deserve 'rewards' when we've done something over and above. Treats make you feel good; feeling good helps lower stress.

These are just a few of the ways to prevent or alleviate pressure. It's unlikely that any of us can get rid of or avoid all harmful stress. But there are certainly enough coping mechanisms at our disposal to make life a whole lot easier and a happier experience.

Stress takes its toll

I would like to share this with you..

In a time when stress levels are growing and work-related worries are at an all-time high, an increasing number of people need help managing their anxiety.

But trying to find help, local officials said, isn't always a simple task.

While there are options for people who need a mental health break, they often come with a cost and strict guidelines for enrollment.

Michael McCartan, executive director of St. Clair County Community Health, said his agency has received an increased number of calls in recent months looking for help. In many cases, he said, his staff is forced to refer those people elsewhere.

"With the funding situation and criteria for eligibility to qualify for programs so rigid, unless people are at risk of hospitalization, there aren't that many programs out there for anybody," McCartan said. "One of the great tragedies is that the programs are least available to people who need the services the most."

Laura Kenny, a therapist and licensed master social worker at Port Huron Hospital, agreed resources can be limited but said there are options for people who need a breather.

Those options range from living in the moment to eating healthy and perhaps even enjoying the calming influences of Lake Huron and the St. Clair River.

Greg Warsinski, 41, of Port Huron knows the effects of work-related stress all too well.

He was laid off from an auto supplier two months ago and watched higher-ups get laid off before that.

Warsinski said he has been trying to stay positive.

"I find my favorite music and listen to it," Warsinski said. "I try to avoid all negativity. If people are talking negative, I just walk away. It's not worth it."

Looking for a job is stressful enough, he said. When he applies for a job, Warsinski said he is competing against hundreds of people.

"I am always fighting depression," Warsinski said.

The stresses of the auto industry have forced Amy Balogh, 25, of Port Huron to look for a job in another field.

The independent contractor is used to being without an everyday job but is looking for something more stable.

Learn different ways to respond to stress

There are many ways you can respond to stress. What is stress?

One important way to fight off and deal with stress is to first recognize that you are indeed suffering from stress.

Others can recognize this before the sufferer actually does. Once a person knows why they are feeling and acting the way they are, they can gradually make changes in their life.

Stress that is not dealt with can be damaging to a person's physical and mental health. There are things you can do to reduce the impact of stress and to cope with the symptoms. It is important to learn how to manage your stress.

Things may feel out of control, but a person can always control the way they respond. Managing stress is all about taking charge of your thoughts, emotions, your schedule, your environment, and the way you deal with problems that arise.

Stress management involves taking care of yourself, making time for rest and relaxation, and changing the stressful situation if you can.

A strong support network is an important factor to help protect against stress. Life stressors do not feel as overwhelming when a person has trusted family or friends that they can count on.

If your relationships are a source of your stress, making it a priority to build stronger and more satisfying relationships can be helpful.

Learning to relax can also be helpful. You can't completely eliminate stress, but learning relaxation techniques such as yoga, meditation, and deep breathing can help on manage it better.

Investing in your emotional health is just as important as maintaining your physical health.

People with good emotional health are able to bounce back from stress and adversity easier.

Being focused, flexible, and positive even during bad and good times can help a person be resilient and manage their stress.

Stress control measures for bride

A couple who is on the verge of getting married will surely be so stressed out as the big day is emerging around the corner.

Hearing the word "bride" we see a portrait of a shy, beautiful and responsible girl in front of our eyes. After marriage she has to change and fulfil her duties in marital life. She faces so many stresses in this new life. In this connection Dr. Asha Bhargav is expressing some stress control measures for bride.   
Life changes cause stress, some of it is good and some of it is not. Getting married is one of those life changes that can prove to be one of the top stresses in our life. There are so many pieces one needs to juggle. The many things that need to be planned or plans that fall through a month before or the day before the wedding. I have heard stories of florists going bankrupt the week before the wedding and airline strikes resulting in changed honeymoon plans. There is the additional challenge of managing family and in-laws and their expectations and behaviors. Sometimes even friendships become strained. These many stresses have a way of building up and creating great anxiety and stress. Although, many of these things can not be avoided, and stress can not be eliminated, we do have the ability to manage stress. Managing stress is critical to our health and well being.
Eat well-balanced meals and don't skip meals. Three to six small meals will do more for our energy levels than eating big meals or skipping meals. This means eat a diet high in fruits and vegetables and low in sugar and refined carbohydrates.
Drink water and cut down on the caffeine. To determine an adequate amount of water to drink one should divide their body weight in half and drinks that amount in ounces. A woman weighing 150 pounds needs to drink 75 ounces of water daily. This keeps one hydrated, helps to flush the body of toxins, keeping us healthy and fighting off disease. Dehydration can be a contributing factor in fatigue!
Exercise does not need to be a two-hour workout at the gym. A daily 20-minute walk around the block at lunchtime will do wonders. If this can be done with a colleague or friend and if you can get in some good belly laughs, all the more power to you.
Quiet time and deep breathing are wonderful ways to nourish the soul and alleviate stress. This can be time spent writing in a journal, meditation, or time in prayer.
Time management is crucial to stress management. The use of a wedding planner book and your calendar will keep things organized by managing appointments and things to be scheduled. Make sure to schedule in fun time that is not wedding related.
The use of affirmations and positive thinking will increase the chances of things going well. Having realistic expectations and avoid negative self-talk or 'all or nothing thinking' is really important. Expecting that the wedding day or that the planning will go smoothly and perfectly is unrealistic. By approaching the challenging situations with a positive attitude your assessment of the situation will improve and things will not appear so negative. Sometimes we need to search hard to find the silver lining.
Clear communication with your fiancé, family members and those involved in preparing for the wedding will ease tensions and prevent assumptions. This does not mean that there won't be problems; it means that you will be in a better position to resolve matters in a respectful way.

Survey: Area women stress more over recession

I would like to share this article with you..

The American Psychiatric Association (APA) has released the findings of a survey on the impact of the recession on women’s mental health. The survey compared results collected nationwide with those in Clinton County, and found that women here encounter greater levels of stress than seen in women nationally.

APA is a national medical specialty society whose more than 38,000 physician members specialize in diagnosis, treatment, prevention and research of mental illnesses, including substance use disorders.

The national telephone survey of 1,000 women ages 30 to 54 was conducted by StrategyOne for APA. The survey was conducted between March 13 and 23 and has a margin of error of plus or minus 3.1 percentage points. The Clinton County sample of 617 interviews has a margin of error of plus or minus 4 percentage points.

Dan Page, vice president for national health media relations for Edelman, a public relations agency that serves APA, said APA wanted to build on its national survey by conducting a second survey focusing on a community that has been especially hard-hit by the recession, but which doesn’t experience experience cyclic recessions, such as Detroit. APA chose Clinton County for that second survey, due to the job losses stemming from DHL’s departure from the air park, and its impact on the local economy.

The APA conducted the survey as part of its “Healthy Minds. Healthy Lives.” campaign, which is designed to improve understanding of mental illnesses, psychiatry and successful treatment options, as well as to reduce the stigma sometimes associated with seeking mental health care.

More than two-thirds of American women interviewed for the survey say that the nation’s sagging economy has negatively affected their lives or the lives of their loved ones. The findings also indicate women may be neglecting their own needs while focusing on other concerns.

Women report sharp increases in stress, anxiety, frustration and other negative mental health indicators since the recession took hold last fall, with job loss pushing these increases even higher. And while more than three-quarters of these women report engaging in one or more positive coping strategies, most tend to prioritize family and other financial responsibilities ahead of their own needs - a tendency that can backfire despite the best of intentions.

“Women will take care of their families before making sure they have what they need to stay healthy. If at all possible, they should avoid spending cuts on activities and resources that can help maintain their own health,” said APA President Nada L. Stotland, M.D., M.P.H. “For instance, keep up the gym membership, even if it means you can’t give your kids the latest electronics. Take time to exercise and eat right. The bottom line is that taking care of your mental health is necessary to your ability to care for your family.”

In this national telephone survey, women rank the ability to provide food, clothing and education for their families, relationships with family and friends, and personal finances such as mortgages and retirement savings, as more important than their own mental and physical health.

“Losing a job or taking a wage cut creates an ongoing source of anxiety for families. Women are particularly affected because they are often juggling the stress of their workplace demands with those of running a household and keeping their families healthy,” Dr. Stotland said. “While this survey focused on women, the answers we found can be indicative of the health and well-being of the entire family. The challenge for each of us is to find effective ways to cope with the stress caused by the economic crisis. Reaching out to a support network can help.”

In comparing the national and Clinton County surveys, APA found women here are under greater levels of stress. More than half of women in Clinton County say they are worried that they or a family member will lose a job in the near future, compared with 40 percent nationally. And nearly two-thirds of women in Clinton County say the economy has had “a negative impact” on their mental health, versus just over half of women polled nationwide. Moreover, when compared with women nationally, the women of Clinton County are much more likely to be experiencing greater levels of stress (45 percent for Clinton County vs. 33 percent nationally), frustration (38 percent vs. 27 percent), anxiety (34 percent vs. 24 percent), irritability (35 percent vs. 23 percent) and insomnia or oversleeping (29 percent vs. 20 percent).

More than one-third (40 percent) nationally and more than half in Clinton County (53 percent), cited worry about whether they or a significant other may lose a job in the near future.

Nearly a quarter of Clinton County women surveyed (24 percent) say someone in their household has lost a job in the past six months because of downsizing or employment cuts - this is 9 percentage points higher than the national average.

Pay cuts affect Clinton County women disproportionately, with 30 percent of women there saying they or a family member has had to take a wage cut in the past six months to keep their jobs, vs. 21 percent nationally.

Almost half of women nationally (48 percent), and even more in Clinton County (52 percent), believe that seeing a mental health professional could help them cope with their economic situation. More than 80 percent of women surveyed nationally and in Clinton County believe seeing a mental health professional for mental health concerns is a sign of strength. More than a third nationally (34 percent) and in Clinton County (37 percent) say they or a family member has received mental health services in the past.

Women are participating in more positive activities than they were six months ago: spending time with family and friends (29 percent nationally vs. 38 percent in Clinton County); praying or going to religious services (25 percent vs. 31 percent); watching television or going to the movies (25 percent vs. 32 percent); reading or listening to music (37 percent vs. 47 percent); exercising, playing sports or relaxing outdoors (21 percent vs. 27 percent); talking to family/friends about emotions or mental health (17 percent vs. 25 percent).

“Even if people are working, it’s emotionally draining to live with a constant fear of losing a job,” said Ohio Psychiatric Physicians Association President, Joseph Locala, M.D. “To help get through these uncertain times, it’s important to find positive ways to cope - whether it’s spending time with friends and family, engaging in hobbies, exercising, or talking with a clergy member or mental health professional.”

Amid the increased stress, most women prioritize others’ needs over their own mental health. Both nationally and in Clinton County, women rank mental health — such as effectively managing stress levels and achieving a balance among their life activities — as less important than relationships with family, friends and colleagues; family responsibilities, such as providing food, clothing and education; personal finances, such as the mortgage, rent or retirement savings.